What is the definition of an accountant?
Someone who solves a problem, you didn't know you had, in a way you don't understand.
(3.9 stars, 7 votes)
Why isn't there a tax on stuff I don't like?
(3.6 stars, 7 votes)
Why do some accountants decide to become actuaries?
They find bookkeeping too exciting.
(3.4 stars, 7 votes)
What's the definition of a good tax accountant?
Someone who has a loophole named after him.
(3.3 stars, 7 votes)
IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
(3.1 stars, 7 votes)
Why did the auditor cross the road?
Because he looked in the file and that's what they did last year.
(2.7 stars, 7 votes)
What’s the most wicked thing a group of young accountants can do?
Go into town and gang-audit someone.
(1.9 stars, 7 votes)
How do you know when an accountant’s on holidays?
He doesn’t wear a tie to work and comes in after 8.30.
(1.7 stars, 7 votes)
What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet?
Lost
(4.3 stars, 8 votes)
What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don't?
Depreciation.
(4.0 stars, 8 votes)
A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
(3.3 stars, 8 votes)
When you do a good deed, get a receipt, in case Heaven is like the IRS.
(3.1 stars, 8 votes)
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