Joke: Things not to Say to the Cop Who Pulls You Over

10. Your so-called "speed limits" mean nothing to me flatfoot. I live my life one quarter-mile at a time.

9. You again? I thought I lost you at that last red light.

8. Aren't you going to strip search me, big boy?

7. I am not the droid you're looking for. You don't need to see my papers.

6. Darn! My radar detector must be broken again.

5. You better hurry up with that ticket. Dunkin' Donuts closes in 15 minutes.

4. You're not going to search my trunk are you?

3. How about you watch my friend Ben Franklin while I get my registration?

2. Sorry I was speeding officer, but your daughter said she had to be home by eleven.

1. Hey Barney! How are things in Mayberry?

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